Pain and Deliverance

You’ve kept track of my every toss and turn through the sleepless nights, each tear entered in your ledger, each ache written in your book.

— Psalm 56:8

 

I had a really bad migraine yesterday. As you know, having a migraine is not an uncommon occurrence for me. In fact, I’ve had one all week. I’ve been having migraine headaches all of my life (literally). Sometimes the pain is mild, sometimes severe. Yesterday’s migraine was a severe one. I have three medicines, Anaprox (550 mg naproxen), Amerge (naratriptan), and Vistaril (Hydroxyzine), that I can take all at once that usually will knock out the headache, but it also knocks me out of commission for at least 24 hours (my former neurologist said they did the same to her), so, I rarely take them in combination even though that’s how they are prescribed. I slept until 7 am this morning, which is why this post is being put up so late. I’m amazed Isabella let me sleep in this long. She tried to wake me, but she seemed to know when I was sick, and it was going to be a losing battle for her.

 

Thankfully, I was able to get out of bed in the morning with only a shadow migraine and without the nausea that often accompanies my worst headaches. Since it’s Sunday, I figured I’d see what the Bible says about migraines. I found some Psalms that offer a little guidance, though I do not believe anyone in biblical times understood migraines (see Hildegard of Bingen for a possible medieval view of migraines). They were probably thought to be demons within a person.

 

(Today, I will use a translation of the Bible called The Message, which is a translation of the Bible in contemporary English by Eugene H. Peterson. It can be quite a wonderful translation for understanding the Bible.)

 

Psalm 56 is David’s psalm asking God for deliverance from his enemies and his declaration of confidence that God will act to bring that deliverance. If you think of a migraine as a battle, this Psalm applies, and migraines are an intense battle. Psalm 56:8 says, “You’ve kept track of my every toss and turn through the sleepless nights, each tear entered in your ledger, each ache written in your book.” Yesterday, I hadn’t been running from enemies seeking to take my life as was David, nor was I lying awake crying out to God for deliverance from oppression or violence. But I was lying awake for quite a while last night trying to fall asleep, as I have many times before, asking God to bring deliverance from these headaches and sickness. Psalm 56:8 is one that can speak to someone with migraines. Every toss and turn I’ve made all these years, every sleepless night, every tear I’ve shed, every agonizing plea for God to heal and deliver; every headache, stomachache, nerve ache, and body ache—God knows, and God cares.

 

Think about this: God keeps track of our sufferings because it matters to him. He knows everything we’re going through and how it specifically and intimately affects us. Every physical, emotional, and spiritual misery we feel is laid out before him. He knows, and he cares. David knew this to be true. That’s why he can declare in verse 9 that “this I know, that God is for me.” Later in verse 11, he sings, “in God I trust; I shall not be afraid.”

 

The pain and misery I feel with my migraines may try to convince me that God has forsaken me. The pain and misery we feel may try to deceive us into thinking that we cannot always depend on God, but we cannot give in to those lies. God is always present, always aware, and always cares for what his people are going through. Because this is true of God, I can trust him as I continue to pray for healing. I can hold firm to his promise that he is for me and will bring me deliverance from the pain (whether physical, emotional, or spiritual) in my life. He will answer my plea. It may be today or next Tuesday or the day I stand before Him in heaven, but deliverance is coming—physical, emotional, and spiritual. So, when you find yourself tossing and turning, turn to God. When your tears flow, let Him collect them. When your aches become more than you can bear, cry out to God, who listens, cares, and answers. I have often done this, especially with the worst of my migraines, and while it may take strong medicines to give me relief, I know that, ultimately, that relief is because of God.