That Tasted Nothing Like Pineapple

Warning: This post will be more graphic and talk about sex much more than I usually do.

The picture above is often a meme saying, “That Tasted Nothing Like Pineapple.” I’ve been reading a lot of gay romance books lately, and there are a few things that always make me roll my eyes when I read them. 

 

The first one is when characters have a hands-free orgasm while having anal sex. Many of us know that being the bottom during sex can be a truly wonderful experience, but for me, it’s never been so outstanding that it caused me to have an orgasm with out any stimulation to my dick. Just saying. While I know it’s possible, it certainly doesn’t happen in the frequency it does during m/m romances. I know it’s a plot device to show that the sex is earth shatteringly good, but my goodness, these authors need to lay off on the hands-free orgasm. If a man did it as many times as some of the characters in these books, it’s more likely that they suffer from premature ejaculation instead of mind-blowing sex.

 

The other thing is that precum and cum is always referred to as tasting bitter. In real life people often describe semen as tasting salty, sweet, bitter, metal, sharp, or sour.  The bitterness or saltiness because it has a more alkaline pH. The sweetness can be attributed to greater sugar content, especially glucose and fructose which give sperm their energy to move. One study suggested that people with diabetes may secrete more sugar into their semen giving it a sweeter taste. A metallic taste is because of the minerals and vitamins it contains.

 

In my personal experience, and maybe yours have been different, I’ve never experienced a man’s semen to taste bitter. These m/m romance authors mostly say that cum is bitter but also often say that it is salty, and that I can agree with. For me, I’ve usually thought that cum had a gamey or sweet taste, or maybe salty sweet. Precum has always tasted sweet to me. I’ve never considered it to be bitter. The truth is that the taste of semen varies from person to person.

 

Although many people insist that certain foods change the taste of their semen, there is no conclusive research to confirm this link. Anecdotally, some people believe that fruits, such as citrus fruits and pineapple, may improve the flavor of semen. Foods that produce a strong odor, such as broccoli and cauliflower, may make semen taste or smell worse. Likewise, foods that tend to change the appearance or smell of other bodily fluids, such as asparagus, may also change the taste of semen. One thing that does alter the taste of a man’s semen is hygiene. It is well established that taste and smell are linked, and in consequence, funky body odor can lead to it tasting funky.

With all that being said, out of my own curiosity, I pose the following questions: Does cum have a bitter taste like so many authors claim? I don’t understand why they always describe it as bitter. Why not say cum has a salty sweet flavor? Authors could describe the taste of cum in differing ways, yet they almost universally say it’s bitter.