Walking in the Light

This is the message we have heard from him and proclaim to you, that God is light and in him there is no darkness at all. If we say that we have fellowship with him while we are walking in darkness, we lie and do not do what is true; but if we walk in the light as he himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin.

— 1 John 1:5–7

Today is a special day for me. Sixteen years ago, I clicked “Publish” on the very first post of The Closet Professor. At the time, I had no idea that one post would become thousands, or that what began as a hobby would become a chronicle of my faith, my struggles, my joys, my grief, and my journey toward authenticity.

Over those sixteen years, I have written about history, museums, literature, travel, and yes, more than a few handsome men. I’ve written about my beloved cats—Victoria, whom longtime readers knew as HRH, and now Isabella—along with my family, my work, and the places I’ve visited. More importantly, I’ve written about the tremendous grief that followed the death of a dear friend, struggles with depression, moments of doubt, unexpected blessings, and the countless ordinary days that quietly shape a life.

Looking back, I realize this blog has become more than a collection of posts. It has become a record of God’s faithfulness through seasons I never could have imagined when I wrote that first entry.

Today’s passage from 1 John reminds us that “God is light and in him there is no darkness at all.” Throughout Scripture, light symbolizes God’s presence, truth, and love. Darkness often represents fear, deception, and the things that keep us separated from God, from others, and sometimes even from ourselves.

For many LGBTQ+ Christians, that imagery carries a deeply personal meaning. Too many of us have spent years believing that who we are had to remain hidden if we wanted to be loved by God or accepted by others. We learned to compartmentalize our lives, revealing only the parts we thought were acceptable while hiding the rest. Living that way is exhausting because we are constantly afraid that someone will discover the truth.

When I chose the name The Closet Professor, it reflected where I was in life. The “closet” was still a place I understood all too well. Over the years, however, the title has taken on a different meaning for me. Rather than being a reminder of hiding, it has become a reminder of the journey God has led me on—from fear toward authenticity, from silence toward honesty, and from believing I had to hide parts of myself to trusting that I am fully known and fully loved by God.

John doesn’t tell us to become perfect before we come into the light. He simply calls us to walk in it.

Walking in the light means living honestly before God. It means trusting that God already knows us completely and loves us completely. It means allowing ourselves to be seen—not because we have everything figured out, but because we trust that God’s grace is greater than our fears.

As I continued writing The Closet Professor, I found myself becoming more honest. Some days that honesty meant celebrating life’s joys. Other days it meant admitting pain, uncertainty, loneliness, or weakness. I discovered that authenticity isn’t something to fear. It is one of the ways God draws us into deeper fellowship with Him and with one another.

John writes, “If we walk in the light as he himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another.” I have experienced that fellowship in ways I never expected. Readers from around the world have shared their own stories, encouraged me during difficult seasons, celebrated happy moments with me, challenged me to think more deeply, and reminded me that none of us walks this journey alone. What began as a simple blog has become a genuine community, and for that I am profoundly grateful.

Sixteen years later, I don’t celebrate The Closet Professor because of the number of posts I’ve written or the number of years it has existed. I celebrate because it reminds me of God’s patient work in my life. Looking back, I can see His light guiding me even when I couldn’t always see the path ahead.

Perhaps that’s what walking in the light really means. It doesn’t mean we’ve arrived. It doesn’t mean we never struggle or stumble. It means we choose, day after day, to keep following the One who is the Light of the World, trusting that every step taken in truth is a step taken closer to God.

As you reflect on today’s passage, I invite you to consider this question: What part of your life is God inviting you to bring into His light? Whatever it may be, remember that His light is not meant to shame us but to reveal the depth of His love, His grace, and His desire that we live as the people He created us to be.

Pic of the Day

Moment of Zen: Getting Hosed

Growing up in the hot, humid South, if you didn’t have a swimming pool or a creek nearby, the garden hose was how you cooled off. We’d drink from it once the warm water ran through or hook it up to a sprinkler and spend hours getting soaked. It’s been decades since I’ve done that, but these pictures make me think maybe it’s time to give it another try… especially with any—or all—of these handsome guys.

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TGIF!

My appointment with the podiatrist went well. He’s a nice guy, but he always seems like he’s in a hurry. He’s one of those doctors who wants to get patients in and out as quickly as possible. Maybe that’s just the nature of being a specialist. The only downside was his nurse. She may have been having a bad day, but she came across as snappy and impatient. She was asking me a lot of questions, which is perfectly fine, except my primary care doctor had only discussed the two main issues he wanted the podiatrist to address. He also mentioned that there were several things going on, and since I always read my clinical notes afterward, I assumed the referral and my medical records would include the additional details. After a while, I was tempted to say, “All of that should be in the referral.”

On the bright side, the appointment itself went well, and I have a better idea of what’s going on with my foot. Hopefully, we’re headed in the right direction.

We had a thunderstorm roll through last night, and with it came a major migraine. I went to bed early and ended up sleeping late this morning. That often happens after a bad migraine. I was also dealing with a lot of brain fog yesterday, which is one of the more frustrating symptoms I get when they’re at their worst. It makes it hard to think clearly or concentrate on much of anything.

I’m feeling much better today, but I’m still worn out. If I’m being honest, I’d be perfectly happy to crawl right back into bed. At least today is a work-from-home day, so I can take things a little easier than if I had to be at the museum. Hopefully, a quieter day will help me fully recover.

I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!

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One Foot at a Time

This morning I’m working, but I’m off this afternoon for a podiatrist appointment. That means I should have most of the afternoon free afterward, and that sounds really nice today.

I’ve seen this podiatrist before, and I have to admit he’s young, cute, and looks like he just walked out of a gym. The last time I saw him, he was wearing track pants, a T-shirt, and sneakers. I certainly didn’t mind—it made it pretty obvious that he practices what he preaches when it comes to staying in shape.

Unfortunately, the eye candy is about the only part of this appointment I’m looking forward to. I don’t like feet, and I especially don’t like anyone messing with mine.

When my primary care doctor was treating this foot issue, I actually didn’t mind the visits. While he worked on my foot, we would chat, something we rarely have time to do during a regular appointment. I’ve been seeing him for about ten years now, so our conversations feel natural and comfortable.

This podiatrist is different. He seems like a perfectly nice guy, but I’ve only seen him in person once several years ago and talked to him on the phone once. Some medical professionals have an incredible ability to put you at ease almost immediately, while with others the interaction just feels a little awkward. It really comes down to that reassuring bedside manner that helps you relax when you’re already feeling a bit vulnerable.

My gastroenterologist is a good example. He’s a genuinely nice guy, and I felt comfortable with him almost immediately. The providers I’ve seen at the headache clinic have been much the same way. Nearly all of them have a gift for making patients feel at ease. Of course, when someone is about to stick more than thirty needles into your head, neck, and shoulders for Botox injections, they probably don’t want you panicking!

So, we’ll see how this afternoon goes. Hopefully the appointment is quick, the news is good, and I can enjoy the rest of my day. Wish me luck!

The 5:00 A.M. Negotiations

Do you ever wake up and think, I really don’t want to deal with today? That’s how I felt this morning. If it weren’t for Isabella, I probably would have slept in. Of course, she had other ideas because breakfast wasn’t going to serve itself.

I think she has finally gotten the message that I’m not getting out of bed before 5:00 a.m. She still makes a halfhearted attempt to wake me around 4:00, but lately she gives up pretty quickly. Instead, she climbs on top of me and waits, making sure she’s in the perfect position for the moment I finally get up. I’m not sure how she knows it’s 4:00 every morning. Sometimes I swear she can read a clock.

I do know why 5:00 a.m. is the point where her patience runs out. That’s when a light in my living automatically comes on every morning. To Isabella, that light means, “Human, breakfast time has officially arrived.”

Well, I’m up now, and she’s fed.

The good news is that she seems to be feeling much better. I haven’t heard her cough in over a week, and she’s acting like her normal, happy self again. I’m very thankful that her asthma appears to be under control. I’m still planning to go ahead with her echocardiogram at the end of the month. Even though she seems healthy again, I want the peace of mind of knowing everything is okay.

I hope all of you have a wonderful day!

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Shall I Compare Thee to a Summer’s Day?

Shall I Compare The to a Summer’s Day?

By William Shakespeare

Sonnet 18

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer’s lease hath all too short a date:
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm’d;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature’s changing course untrimm’d;
But thy eternal summer shall not fade,
Nor lose possession of that fair thou owest;
Nor shall Death brag thou wander’st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou growest:
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.

About the Poem

If I had to choose a favorite sonnet, it would be this one. I have loved Sonnet 18 since I was a student, and it became one of my favorite poems to teach. It is one of those rare works that is both beautifully written and remarkably accessible. Even readers who are intimidated by Shakespeare often find themselves drawn into its simple but profound central idea.

Most people remember the opening line, “Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?” But the poem is not really about comparing someone to summer. In fact, Shakespeare quickly argues that summer is an inadequate comparison. Summer is unpredictable. It can be too hot, too windy, or too brief. Every beautiful thing eventually fades.

The person addressed in the poem, however, will not.

Of course, Shakespeare does not mean that his beloved will never grow old or die. Instead, he makes a bold claim about the power of poetry itself. Through these “eternal lines,” the beloved’s beauty is preserved. As long as people continue to read the poem, the beloved continues to live in the imagination of each new generation.

There is also another reason this sonnet has remained meaningful to many LGBTQ+ readers. Although Shakespeare never identifies the beloved’s gender within the poem itself, Sonnet 18 is part of the collection commonly known as the Fair Youth sequence. These sonnets are addressed to a young man, making them among the most famous expressions of affection between men in English literature. Whether one interprets them as romantic, platonic, or deliberately ambiguous, they remind us that love, admiration, and beauty have always existed in many forms throughout history.

More than four hundred years later, Shakespeare’s prediction has proven true. Countless generations have read these lines, memorized them, taught them, and fallen in love with them. His beloved remains immortal—not because time stood still, but because great art can outlast time itself.

Sonnet 18 was first published in 1609 as part of Shakespeare’s collection of 154 sonnets. It is written in the traditional Shakespearean sonnet form: fourteen lines of iambic pentameter with the rhyme scheme ABAB CDCD EFEF GG.

The poem begins as a comparison between the beloved and a summer’s day but quickly overturns the comparison by arguing that nature’s beauty is temporary. The closing couplet delivers one of the most famous conclusions in English literature, asserting that poetry grants a kind of immortality by preserving beauty across generations.

Today, Sonnet 18 remains one of the best-known and most frequently taught poems in the English language.

About the Poet

William Shakespeare is widely regarded as one of the greatest writers in the English language. Born in 1564 in Stratford-upon-Avon, he wrote approximately thirty-nine plays, 154 sonnets, and several narrative poems.

His works explore timeless themes of love, ambition, jealousy, forgiveness, mortality, and the complexity of human nature. Four centuries after his death, Shakespeare’s plays continue to be performed around the world, and his poetry remains a cornerstone of English literature.

The sonnets, in particular, have inspired generations of readers because of their emotional depth and enduring questions about beauty, love, time, and memory. Among them, Sonnet 18 stands as perhaps the clearest expression of Shakespeare’s belief that while human life is fleeting, great poetry has the power to preserve what we cherish long after we are gone.