Inspirational Quote

“We deserve to experience love fully, equally, without shame and without compromise.” — Elliot Page

Love is one of the most fundamental human experiences, yet for too long, LGBTQ+ individuals have been told that their love is something to be hidden, altered, or diminished. Elliot Page’s words remind us that love should be free from fear and compromise. No one should have to justify their identity or fight for the right to love openly and authentically.

This quote speaks to the importance of equality—not just in legal rights, but in the way love is valued and respected in society. It’s a call to reject shame and embrace pride, to push back against narratives that suggest LGBTQ+ love is anything less than beautiful and valid. Whether in relationships, friendships, or self-love, everyone deserves to experience love without barriers. Today, let this quote serve as a reminder to support, uplift, and celebrate each other in our journeys toward full acceptance and joy.

Since it’s Thursday, here’s your Isabella Pic of the Week:

This is about as close as I get to her cuddling. She’s not a cuddly cat, and she also seems to not like her picture being taken.

Broadening the Mind

“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.”

—Mark Twain

The above quote by Mark Twain emphasizes the transformative power of travel in broadening one’s perspective and combating ignorance, prejudice, and narrow-mindedness. Travel exposes people to different cultures, customs, and ways of thinking, which challenges preconceived notions, stereotypes, and biases. It fosters empathy and understanding by showing the diversity and complexity of human experiences.

Twain acknowledges that many individuals remain confined to their limited worldviews because they have not had the opportunity—or the inclination—to step outside their familiar surroundings. He suggests that travel could help these individuals overcome their prejudices. By encountering different perspectives and lifestyles, travelers develop a more inclusive, kind, and generous attitude toward others. This openness leads to a deeper appreciation of humanity’s shared values and differences.

Remaining in a single place or within a single worldview limits personal growth and understanding. Twain suggests that staying in a “bubble” leads to stagnation, whereas exploration brings enlightenment and growth. In essence, Twain is advocating for travel as a means to expand one’s mind, challenge ignorance, and promote a more compassionate and inclusive outlook on life.

I have not had much of a chance to travel recently because I am not counting going back to Alabama for the holidays or traveling to conferences for work. I would love to get away and spend a few days in Montreal or go on another gay retreat like the one I went to a few years ago at Easton Mountain. When the weather gets warmer, I would love to visit Ogunquit, Maine, or Provincetown, Massachusetts, both towns known for LGBTQ+ tourists, with numerous LGBTQ+-owned and -operated hotels, restaurants, and bars. I haven’t taken a gay themed vacation in a while and would love for the chance to do so. Of course, I wish I could take a trip to Europe, but I definitely can’t afford to cross the Atlantic, but a boy can dream.


I have not posted an Isabella picture of the week in a couple of weeks, so here you go:

It’s Never Too Late

George Eliot is quoted as saying, “It is never too late to be what you might have been,” and I feel like that describes my life in a way. All through high school and most of college, I aspired to be a lawyer; however, after working for a lawyer for a couple of years, I realized that I did not really want to go into law. I eventually decided that I’d rather be a teacher. I had always thought that maybe I could teach adjunct or teach in some way if I became a lawyer, but I finally came to the decision that I’d be happier as a teacher. That decision led me to go to graduate school because I wanted to teach history in college, and while I did teach college classes, that never became a full-time reality. I ended up teaching high school for five years, five stressful and painful years. When I left my job as a teacher, I realized that I wanted to work in museums. I was in my late thirties and decided to make another career change. My job search led me to finding a job in Vermont, somewhere I had never considered living. However, I have found that I love my job, and I love Vermont. I not only get to teach and work in a museum, but I also became a professor, which I never thought would be possible when I abandoned my PhD. I especially never thought I would ever get the chance to teach about my research, but I will be doing just that next semester.

We have the possibility of personal growth and transformation at any stage on our life. We just have to seize the opportunity when it presents itself. The sentiment encourages people to recognize that their past choices or circumstances do not have to define their future. It conveys a message of hope and empowerment, suggesting that individuals always have the opportunity to change, pursue their passions, or fulfill untapped potential. The above quote form George Eliot challenges the idea that there’s a fixed timeline for achieving one’s goals or becoming the person one aspires to be. They imply that the capacity for reinvention and progress is boundless, provided one has the will and determination to take action. This perspective aligns with her broader literary themes of human resilience, moral growth, and the importance of striving for a meaningful life despite difficulties or setbacks.

Alexander Graham Bell is often given credit for the quote, “When one door closes, fortune will usually open another.” The quote actually comes from Fernando de Rojas (c. 1465–1541), a Spanish author best known for writing La Celestina, one of the most significant works of Spanish literature and a precursor to the Spanish Golden Age. It doesn’t really matter who said it first, since it has been said many times, but it’s true. When I had to leave my PhD program because I could not longer afford to continue, I was devastated and thought I’d never be the professor I had aspired to be. When I lost my job teaching high school (I was replaced by a coach), I was devastated and thought my teaching career was over. When I found out my original position at my museum was ending, I didn’t know what I was going to do. However, it eventually led to my current position and my appointment as a professor at my university.

We never know where our lives will lead us or what path our lives will take. Sometimes, it is a bumpy, uneven path, sometimes we may veer off the path and get lost in the woods, but if we allow ourselves to get back on the path, we will eventually reach our destination. When you are feeling lost, know that the path is still there, you just have to find it again.



Since it is Thursday, here is your Isabella pic of the week:

Quotes to Ponder

I have always been fascinated by the 19th century transcendentalists. Ralph Waldo Emerson’s (1803 - 1882) philosophy often aligns with my own. He was seen as a champion of individualism and critical thinking, as well as a prescient critic of the countervailing pressures of society and conformity. My favorite piece of his writing is his 1841 essay “Self-Reliance.” It contains the most thorough statement of one of his recurrent themes: the need for each person to avoid conformity and false consistency, and follow his or her own instincts and ideas. It is the source of one of his most famous quotations:

"A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines."

However, this is not the quote that inspired me to write this post. This one was written in his journal on November 8, 1838:

"Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted."

Emerson’s words retain relevance today, particularly in the age of the 24-hour news cycle when outrageous sound bites that command the most attention and elicit the highest amount of clicks is heard over and over. It is especially relevant when we have a presidential candidate who loves to portray himself as a persecuted (and prosecuted) martyr. 

In the quote, Emerson condemns those who are so ridiculously devoted to the righteousness of their own ideas that anything which poses a contrary opinion must inherently be dangerous. Republicans, especially Trump, consistently complain that they are being persecuted when anyone disagrees with them, and they have several 24-hour news stations that back these false claims of persecution often with misleading or inaccurate information. They use these tactics because, like the Republicans they prostrate themselves to, want everyone to conform to their way of thinking. They claim they want people to be self-reliant, but they demand everyone conform to their small minded ideas. 

Over many years, I have learned that my happiness doesn’t come from conformity but depends on embracing who I am. The world would be a boring place if we all acted and thought the same way. It would be nothing more than mindless drones. I tend to believe that those people who conform to what others think they should are often the most unhappy and often angry. Our country was founded on the ideals communicated in the Declaration of Independence and the belief that all are created equal and are able to pursue “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”

So those are my thoughts of the day. Now, here is your picture of Isabella for the week:

Time

The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.

—Bertrand Russell

People often have different definitions of what wasting time means. I know of a lot of people who were told when they were younger that they were wasting time because they were doing something they enjoyed. Maybe they were day dreaming, doodling, or even reading a book, but if you think about it, the imagination of poets and writers comes from their day dreams, great artists began as doodlers, and reading is how we learn. We agree with Bertrand Russell that if you enjoyed what you are doing, then you’re not wasting your time.

Bertrand Arthur William Russell, 3rd Earl Russell, OM, FRS (18 May 1872 – 2 February 1970) was a British mathematician, philosopher, and public intellectual. 

Good Morning!

“Today’s goals: Coffee and kindness. Maybe two coffees, and then kindness.” 

– Nanea Hoffman

Nanea Hoffman (@NaneaHoffman) describes herself as the Founder/Principle of Sweatpants & Coffee and creator of the mental health mascot, the Anxiety Blob. Writer, dreamer, coffee lover, blanket fort dweller.

Lifting Up Others

"If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else."

— Booker T. Washington 

I wish more people would remember this. Too many people only want to tear people down to make themselves feel better. They know that if they can keep people they deem unworthy down, they can stay in power. Republicans are currently doing everything they can to discredit people who cherish equality. They use their political positions to take away the rights of others, especially the right to vote and representation in the government. 

Alabama has been gerrymandering the districts of the legislature and Congress to make sure they remain in power. Thankfully, the federal courts, backed by the Supreme Court, has ordered Alabama to create a second minority majority district. Growing up in Alabama, I lived in the 2nd Congressional district and have also lived in the 7th Congressional district, which has traditionally been the only minority majority district in the state. I am very happy that the courts seem to be ordering that the 2nd Congressional district be redrawn to also be a minority majority district. While I hope to never live in Alabama again, especially in either the 2nd or 7th Congressional districts, I am glad that they are very likely to both be represented by Democrats.

A Rainbow In Someone’s Cloud

“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud. Do not complain. Make every effort to change things you do not like. If you cannot make a change, change the way you have been thinking. You might find a new solution.” 

— Maya Angelou

 

Maya Angelou said, "I've had so many rainbows in my clouds. I had a lot of clouds, but I had so many rainbows." Within every cloud, there is a silver lining. From every patch of rain, somewhere there is a rainbow to be found. Have you ever had days, weeks, or months in your life when it seems as though the clouds won’t pass and the rain just won’t stop falling? It’s safe to say that at one point or another most of us have experienced this kind of difficult season. Perhaps you lost a lover or friend, or you experienced the pain of death, or maybe life just threw one too many curveballs at once, and you just felt sad for a while. Sometimes that sadness can be overwhelming and take over for long periods of time or may never go away. No matter how it happens, we can all appreciate that life’s moments are not always filled with sunshine.

 

With this knowledge in mind, there is a simple and powerful perspective that we can all choose to embrace; that each person you come across is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Whether it’s internally or externally, every person you meet is dealing with something that is challenging for them. Angelou wrote, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

 

While we certainly can’t save people from their pain, we all have the power to influence one another in positive ways.  We each have the power to give to one another in a way that is meaningful and impactful. To be the rainbow in someone’s cloud means to cultivate loving kindness as a daily practice in your life. It means looking into your heart, practicing empathy, and using that empathy to connect to the people around you. We all have the opportunity to be someone’s rainbow. Probably the greatest part of adopting this practice is that our efforts don’t need to be overwhelming. Something as simple as a smile can greatly help someone who is going through a difficult time. 

 

Maya Angelou said she always carried these "rainbows" with her to her speaking and teaching engagements, whether in a large venue or an intimate classroom. "I bring everyone who has ever been kind to me with me," she said. "Black, white, Asian, Spanish-speaking, Native American, gay, straight, everybody. I said, 'Come on with me. I'm going on the stage. Come with me. I need you now.'" Whether her "rainbows" were living or had long since passed, Dr. Angelou said she always felt and drew strength from their support. "I don't ever feel I have no help," she said. "I had rainbows in my clouds."

 

She also encouraged people to apply the "rainbow in the clouds" philosophy to their own lives. "The thing to do, it seems to me, is to prepare yourself so you can be a rainbow in somebody else's cloud. Somebody who may not look like you. May not call God the same name you call God -- if they call God at all. I may not dance your dances or speak your language. But be a blessing to somebody. That's what I think."

 

To choose to live from a place of loving-kindness is one of the greatest gifts you can give to the world and to yourself. Not only will you impact others in a positive way but you also give yourself a purpose outside of your own needs, which brings fulfillment and ultimately happiness for you too. When we are kind to others, we learn that we matter, that we are powerful, and that what we do on a daily basis really does have an impact on the world around us.

 

Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud today and practice more kindness in your life.

Liberty v. Power

The love of liberty is the love of others; the love of power is the love of ourselves.

—William Hazlitt

William Hazlitt (10 April 1778 – 18 September 1830) was an English essayist, drama and literary critic, painter, social commentator, and philosopher. In the above quote, Hazlitt makes a point that is relevant today as it was over 200 years ago when he was alive. As we see more and more right wing politicians striving for greater power by taking away the liberty of those they deem unworthy or a threat to their power. They attack those who are most vulnerable: transgender youth (and all other LGBTQ+ people), immigrants, minorities, and the list grows on and on. It’s not just Donald Trump, Ron DeSantis, and their followers, but this trend towards a 21st century fascism is on the rise around the world. 

Thomas Paine began his pamphlet The Crisis with these famous words, “These are the times that try men’s souls; the summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of his country; but he that stands it now, deserves the love and thanks of man and woman. Tyranny, like hell, is not easily conquered; yet we have this consolation with us, that the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph.”

The right wing politicians are definitely “summer soldier and the sunshine patriot.” They wrap their undemocratic laws and policies in the name of protecting democracy, yet they are really trying to destroy democracy. The greatest threat is that if they come to power, their tyranny will “not easily conquered.” The more laws they pass and the more the courts side with these policies, the harder it will be to undo the damage. 

We Need Books!

“I have a foreboding of an America in my children's or grandchildren's time -- when the United States is a service and information economy; when nearly all the manufacturing industries have slipped away to other countries; when awesome technological powers are in the hands of a very few, and no one representing the public interest can even grasp the issues; when the people have lost the ability to set their own agendas or knowledgeably question those in authority; when, clutching our crystals and nervously consulting our horoscopes, our critical faculties in decline, unable to distinguish between what feels good and what's true, we slide, almost without noticing, back into superstition and darkness...

The dumbing down of American is most evident in the slow decay of substantive content in the enormously influential media, the 30 second sound bites (now down to 10 seconds or less), lowest common denominator programming, credulous presentations on pseudoscience and superstition, but especially a kind of celebration of ignorance”  

― Carl Sagan, The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark (1997)

 

In his 1997 book The Demon-Haunted World, Carl Sagan warned us about the “dumbing down” of America. He warned of a time when our “critical faculties in decline, unable to distinguish between what feels good and what's true, we slide, almost without noticing, back into superstition and darkness...” Sadly, Sagan’s prediction is coming true, and that time is upon us. We must do all we can to prevent that darkness from taking hold. In his book Cosmos, Sagan wrote, "Our passion for learning ... is our tool for survival." We will perish as a nation and lose any freedom we have if we allow this “dumbing down” of America to persist.

 

Last month, Montana withdrew from the American Library Association (ALA). A few days ago, a Texas state commission will disassociate with the progressive American Library Association following accusations that it pushes Marxism and gender ideology through children’s literature. A right-wing group of women in Alabama calling themselves “Clean Up Alabama” are advocating that the Alabama Republican party push to disassociate with the ALA. Republican officials in at least seven other states (Arizona, Idaho, Illinois, Georgia, Louisiana, South Carolina, and Wyoming) are also pushing to completely withdraw from ALA.

 

The ALA provides member libraries with resources and benefits like discounts on professional development, insurance and employment aid, continuing education, and other programs. They also provide a code of ethics for librarians, and we all know that many Republicans, especially those loyal to Donald Trump, do not believe in codes of ethics. They are no longer satisfied with banning books and classes that teach about LGBTQ+ and other minority histories. They want to get rid of the libraries that keep and lend them, too. Right-wing extremists are on the march to destroy the intellect of America.

 

In the 1930s, the German Student Union began a campaign to ceremonially burn books in Nazi Germany and Austria. The books targeted for burning were those viewed as being subversive or as representing ideologies opposed to Nazism. These included books written by Jewish, half-Jewish, communist, socialist, anarchist, liberal, pacifist, and sexologist authors among others. The initial books burned were those of Karl Marx and Karl Kautsky, but came to include very many authors, including Albert Einstein, Helen Keller, writers in French and English, and effectively any book incompatible with Nazi ideology. In a campaign of cultural genocide, books were also burned en masse by the Nazis in occupied territories, such as in Poland. Today, the Far Right and Christian Conservatives are wanting to ban books that were written by African Americans, LGBTQ+ authors, communist, socialist, anarchist, and liberal, authors among others. They may not be burning books (although some actually are), but they are taking them out of circulation in libraries and schools.

 

Sinclair Lewis First published It Can't Happen Here, in 1935, when Americans were still largely oblivious to the rise of Hitler in Europe. The prophetic novel tells a cautionary tale about the fragility of democracy and offers an alarming, eerily timeless look at how fascism could take hold in America. In the book, Doremus Jessup, a Vermont newspaper editor, is dismayed to find that many of the people he knows support presidential candidate Berzelius Windrip. The suspiciously fascist Windrip is offering to save the nation from sex, crime, welfare cheats, and a liberal press. But after Windrip wins the election, dissent soon becomes dangerous for Jessup. Windrip forcibly gains control of Congress and the Supreme Court and, with the aid of his personal paramilitary storm troopers, turns the United States into a totalitarian state. While today, Democrats hold the White House and the Senate, Republicans control the House of Representatives, though with a slim majority, and are firmly in control of the Supreme Court. The rhetoric of right-wing politicians, not only in the United States but across the world, are claiming that when in power they can save the nation from sex, crime, welfare cheats, and a liberal press. They will also suppress the ability to think as they are taking away the tools to learn to think.

 

Sagan was quoted in Lily Splane's Quantum Consciousness as saying, "It is the responsibility of scientists never to suppress knowledge, no matter how awkward that knowledge is, no matter how it may bother those in power; we are not smart enough to decide which pieces of knowledge are permissible and which are not." I will take that one step further, it is not just the responsibility of scientists but all educators, librarians, and museum professionals to never suppress knowledge. The far right has always vilified college professors and intellectuals because they fear the truth. They are so afraid of someone thinking freely, that they brainwash people with 24-hour news channels like Fox News and Newsmax. They even seem to be gaining ground with CNN, though MSNBC holds steadfastly to presenting opposing viewpoints. 

 

Sagan also said in The Demon-Haunted World, "The cure for a fallacious argument is a better argument, not the suppression of ideas." However, in the current state of America and many other countries with far-right parties gaining ground, fascist conservatives (though not all conservatives are fascist), are fighting to make sure people are not able to hear a better argument. Susan recently sent me a joke that went like this, “How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Trump says it’s done and they all cheer in the dark.” It would be funnier if it weren’t so true. For the first 234 years of the nation's history, no American president or former president had ever been indicted. That has changed this year. Donald Trump has been charged in four criminal cases which include 91 criminal charges over a four-and-a-half-month span, and yet, he is still the frontrunner, and by a considerable margin, for the 2024 Republican presidential nomination. 

It Must Be Thursday…

“This must be Thursday,” said Arthur to himself, sinking low over his beer. “I never could get the hang of Thursdays.”

—Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy 

Life’s Journey

Just some sage advice for the day:

“Always look at what you have left. Never look at what you have lost.” — Robert H. Schuller

 

“Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.” — Robert Breault

 

“In a forest of a hundred thousand trees, no two leaves are alike. And no two journeys along the same path are alike.”  —  Paulo Coelho

 

“Pursue some path, however narrow and crooked, in which you can walk with love and reverence.” — Henry David Thoreau

Uninteresting Times

Supposedly, there is a “Chinese Curse” that says: May you live in interesting times. While seemingly a blessing, the expression is normally said ironically. The idea is that “uninteresting times” are times of peace and tranquility, and “interesting times” are often periods of great turmoil. There’s one problem with this “curse,” it’s not Chinese. No equivalent saying exists in the Chinese lexicon. 

The “curse” is most likely a British invention and is really from the speeches of the British politician Joseph Chamberlain. Chamberlain was the father of Austen Chamberlain, who received the Nobel Peace Prize for his work to reconcile the relationship between Germany and France after World War 1. By a different marriage, Chamberlain was also the father of British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain, who so erroneously declared after the Munich Agreement in 1938, “I believe it is peace for our time.” 

Austen and Neville lived disastrously in “interesting times.” While neither man is seen in history as a great leader, Austen probably delayed World War II by more than a decade with his negotiation of the Dawes Pact, and some historians are even reassessing Neville’s reputation. Neville Chamberlain no doubt knew he was not preventing a war with Germany, but knew the British were woefully unprepared for a war with Germany, and he needed to buy time Britain to arm for the war to come.

So, the fact that this week is not very interesting is, I guess, not a bad thing. I have something exciting happening on Friday, but I don’t want to “jinx” it. I’m not going to discuss it just yet, just know that it could result in some changes in my life.

Listen

"The most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention…. A loving silence often has far more power to heal and to connect than the most well-intentioned words."

 

—Rachel Naomi Remen

 

Rachel Naomi Remen is a physician and educator. She was trained as a pediatrician but gained fame as an author and teacher of alternative medicine in the form of integrative medicine. In the quote above, she is talking about using empathy and listening to help heal a person. Isn’t that what therapists often do? They don’t tell their patients what they should do, but they listen to the patient and ask the right questions to guide them to realize for themselves what they should do. At least, that’s how I see therapy.

 

As some of you know, I am an oral historian. I rarely conduct interviews anymore because the primary responsibilities of my job have changed. However, I am often asked to teach others how to conduct oral histories. There are technical aspects, such as recording and digitally archiving, that can be taught to anyone. I teach the protocols of good manners when scheduling and conducting interviews. These are all important lessons that are necessary for conducting a good oral history. However, conducting a great oral history can’t always be taught. The reason is that a person must learn to listen. They need to listen to what the interviewee says, how the interviewee says it, the inflections of the interviewee’s voice, and the body language of the interviewee. This can be achieved through learning to be empathetic and listening with your “third ear.”

 

The "third ear," a concept introduced by psychoanalyst Theodor Reik, refers to the practice of listening for the deeper layers of meaning in order to glean what has not been said outright. It means perceiving the emotional underpinnings conveyed when someone is speaking to you. You can’t listen with your third ear if you are speaking and not listening. As Remen said, “A loving silence often has far more power to heal and to connect than the most well-intentioned words." You might not immediately see why I think this is great advice for an oral historian. After all, it’s used in psychoanalysis, but part of being an oral historian is using the same techniques as a therapist. You have to listen not only to what is spoken but also to what is not spoken. Notice I did not say “what is said” because we can speak in ways other than vocal words.

 

One of the things we learned, while I was at my retreat to Easton Mountain, was ecstatic dance. Now, I am not a great dancer, but that’s not the point of ecstatic dance. Ecstatic dance is moving in a way your body tells you to move and remove your inhibitions. During ecstatic dance, we were told to not speak vocally but only speak through body language. I guess you can think of it as a form of interpretive dance. You “listen” to the other person’s body language, facial expressions, etc., to understand what they are saying. Now, I will not be teaching ecstatic dance as a way to learn to listen to your third ear, but it would not be the worst way to teach it. 

 

The most important thing to listening with your third ear is to have empathy. Oral histories are done for two major reasons that are intertwined. First, the oral historian is recording history from the mouths of those who lived it, and second, it is to let the interviewee tell their story. A lot of times, we just need to let our voices be heard, though we may not always know it. The oral historian's job is to bring out that story in a person. Oral histories can tell us so much about the person and the history that person lived. The emotions and reactions, or lack thereof, can speak as much as the spoken word. Listening with the third ear allows you to read a person and to take clues from their body language and voice that will tell you: Should I continue with this line of questioning? Should I stop this line of questioning? How can I get more of the story? When have you gone too far? Etc. In oral histories, you have to know when to hold back, and that comes from listening with your third ear. If you push too hard at the wrong time, then the interviewee is likely to shut down, and it won’t be you who is silent anymore. It will be the interviewee. By not practicing empathy, you can ruin an interview.

 

 These are lessons that we can develop in our everyday lives. People who have prejudices do not have empathy. They cannot understand why someone is different from them. They only care that the person falls in line with their beliefs. I often say that the central tenet of Christianity is unconditional love. Those who ignore the command to love do so because they have no empathy for others. They only have hatred. Empathy is so important in our lives. It allows the world to be a better place. So, I challenge you to be more empathetic in your life: to “give each other is our attention” and to offer “a loving silence.” Empathy can help cure the world of many of the ills that humanity often brings with their prejudices.

 

I could probably write a whole book on the importance of listening, but I’ll stop my ramblings at this point and just say, “Listen.”

Primal Nature

The need for connection and community is primal, as fundamental as the need for air, water, and food.

—Dean Ornish

 

I’m leaving on my retreat today. I thought this quote was somewhat apropos for the type of retreat I am going to. The retreat is designed to disconnect from social norms and reconnect with nature. We will be engaging in workshops like art, body movement, and photography, as well as rituals, trance dance, and fire ceremony. I really need this getaway, and I am going to make the most of it.

Having A Good Day

“I have learned over the years that the nicest thing I can do is to just say to myself, “Good Morning Darling, I love you; we're going to have a really great day today.”

― Louise Hay

 

 “It’s time to start living the life you’ve imagined.”

― Henry James

 

“I hope everyone that is reading this is having a really good day. And if you are not, just know that in every new minute that passes, you have an opportunity to change that.”

― Gillian Anderson

 

I am so glad that it's finally Friday. Even though this was a short week because of the Monday holiday, it felt like a long week. Yesterday, I kept thinking it was Wednesday, not Thursday, and the day before Tuesday, not Wednesday. So, I did not write a quote post yesterday. I'm going to make up for it today with three quotes.

While I have never followed Louis Hay's advice above, I'm going to try to do that each morning. Thinking positively doesn't always work because of brain chemistry or bad things that happen during the day. However, I think we should at least start out with a positive thought for the day. I love the quote by Henry James because it reinforces the idea of the power of positive thinking. If we do our best to live the life we imagine for ourselves, then we might just achieve it.

I just have the feeling today is going to be a good day. At least, that is my hope. I'm working from home today, as I do on most Fridays, and that makes for a good start to the day. I'm also excited about next week. Monday through Wednesday are probably not going to be great days. I will be working in the office, but on Thursday, I leave for my weekend retreat. I had originally planned to leave on Friday, but there was an option to add an extra day, so I did. I'm sure I will be nervous. I've never spent that much time with just gay men, but I'm looking forward to it. I've always been awkward around men, but I'm going to try to change that.

So, to quote Gillian Anderson, “I hope everyone that is reading this is having a really good day. And if you are not, just know that in every new minute that passes, you have an opportunity to change that.”

Mwah! 😘 Kisses 'til Sunday. (Don't worry, my usual Moment of Zen will still be posted tomorrow along with the usual Pics of the Day.)

Thursday’s Quote

"When a man is denied the right to live the life he believes in, he has no choice but to become an outlaw."

- Nelson Mandela

 

Yesterday marked one year since the school shooting in Uvalde, Texas. A gunman walked into a school and killed nineteen children and two adults in the deadliest shooting ever at a Texas public school. It made me think about the priorities in the United States. As far as I know, lawmakers have not passed a single law to try and curb access to the weapons used in these shootings. Though Vermont might with several bills currently moving through the legislature, that is if our Republican governor doesn’t veto them. Even if Vermont does the sensible thing, lawmakers in several states have passed, laws to curb the rights of LGBTQ+ people, and the MAGAts are harassing employees at stores like Target for selling Pride merchandise during the month of June, and it's not even June yet.

 

We must ask ourselves why some politicians are not afraid of a mass shooting incident in our schools, yet non-white and LGBTQ+ seem to scare them to death. Where are their priorities? Instead of having sensible gun laws like all other developed nations, which have significantly fewer mass shootings, they focus their fear on taking away rights and trying to shame "woke" individuals. They fear teachers mentioning anything LGBTQ+ related in the classroom. These right-wing legislatures are defunding diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) programs because the thought of DEI policies scares them to death. They've banned drag queens from having Drag Queen Story Hour in public libraries or even performing in public. The greatest danger for these politicians is not worrying about students getting killed in their classrooms but that some may be transgender. They deny these kids healthcare because they don't conform to these bigots' ideas of heterosexual, Christian, and white racial superiority. They are scared to death that they will lose even the smallest amount of power and control over people.

 

When Nelson Mandela said, "When a man is denied the right to live the life he believes in, he has no choice but to become an outlaw," he was talking about apartheid in South Africa. But if a person is denied the right to dress in a way that doesn't conform to "MAGA values" or even acknowledge diversity, they are making large sections of the LGBTQ+ population outlaws. Sadly, with the current ultra-conservative majority on the U.S. Supreme Court, any lawsuits against these laws will probably stand, even if they violate the First Amendment, the most fundamental principle of freedom in the United States.

Let’s face it, if you are more afraid of what this might do to a kid in a library…

…than what this might do to a child in a school…

…then you are monumentally fucking stupid.

The Present

Yesterday's the past, tomorrow's the future, but today is a gift. That's why it's called the present.

Bil Keane

I was staying with my granny last night to give my mother a break, and I had limited internet access at her house.  Therefore, I was having trouble deciding on a topic today, so a quote will have to suffice.  

By the way, I've begun reading Go Set a Watchman by Harper Lee that came out this week.  I can't wait to finish it so I can review it.  Is anyone else reading it?

Artists

I have come to believe that a great teacher is a great artist and that there are as few as there are any other great artists. Teaching might even be the greatest of the arts since the medium is the human mind and spirit.

John Steinbeck

The Dandy

Quite honestly, I really had no idea what to write about today; however, I came across this picture and the fist thought in my mind was "dandy."  A dandy is a man who places particular importance upon physical appearance, refined language, and leisurely hobbies, pursued with the appearance of nonchalance in a cult of Self.  Historically, especially in late 18th- and early 19th-century Britain, a dandy, who was self-made, often strove to imitate an aristocratic lifestyle despite coming from a middle-class background.  Though the definition of a dandy may sound like a bad stereotype of a gay man, many of the dandies in history were homosexual.

The dandy creates his own unity by aesthetic means. But it is an aesthetic of negation. "To live and die before a mirror": that according to Baudelaire, was the dandy's slogan. It is indeed a coherent slogan. The dandy is, by occupation, always in opposition. He can only exist by defiance. Up to now, man derived his coherence from the Creator. But from the moment that he consecrates his rupture from Him, he finds himself delivered over to the fleeting moment, to the passing days, and to wasted sensibility. Therefore he must take himself in hand. The dandy rallies his forces and creates a unity for himself by the very violence of his refusal. Profligate, like all people without a rule of life, he is only coherent as an actor. But an actor implies a public; the dandy can only play a part by setting himself up in opposition. He can only be sure of his own existence by finding it in the expression of others' faces. Other people are his mirror. A mirror that quickly becomes clouded, it's true, since human capacity for attention is limited. It must be ceaselessly stimulated, spurred on by provocation. The dandy, therefore, is always compelled to astonish. Singularity is his vocation, excess his way to perfection. Perpetually incomplete, always on the fringe of things, he compels others to create him, while denying their values. He plays at life because he is unable to live it.

—Albert Camus