Last night, I was a bit blue. I'm not sure why it's hit me last night, but it did. I'd had a good day at work, but it was one of those days when I felt lonely. I feel like my family has forgotten about me. My mother rarely calls. Even when Mama calls, it's rarely a pleasant conversation. I haven't heard from my aunt in what seems like forever. I know I could call them but when I'm in a mood like this I don't want to talk to anybody. I also miss my kitties something terrible. I love my apartment and would hate to give it up, and even if I did, I'm not sure the cats would do well up here. They'd be taken away from their familiar surroundings and the other cats. Once cats make a feline family, it's hard to take them away from it. My aunt's cats are what they grew up with and I don't think they'd like being taken away at this point. So I'm kind of torn about taking them away from their home, even if I found an apartment that would allow cats.
Truth be told, I haven't felt good this week. Wednesday I went home sick from work because of a backache and a headache. I felt better yesterday, but not 100 percent. Today though is Good Friday. Nearly 2000 years ago, Jesus was crucified. It was the darkest day for his followers. They did not understand that on the third day he would rise again and bring hope to the world. I wish people could actually see and understand the loving nature of Christ. He wanted us to live in a world without prejudices or greed, a world with hope and inspiration. I honestly think that Christ weeps at the site of the world today. I believe that Jesus is saddened by the state of what many call Christianity today. Today, it is a religion of prejudice, hatred, and greed, when it should be a religion of hope, faith, inspiration, and charity.
Remember that Good Friday is a day to contemplate the suffering that Jesus endured for our salvation. John 3:16 says, "For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life."
6 comments:
Sounds something like being homesick, away from home and all the familiar surroundings....you will recover when the spring comes and flowers bloom and birds sing!!!! Happy Easter is here!!!
Amen on your religious views brother! Sometimes i sit & remember when I was coming up in Christianity and think back to how the lay were basically taught to be God's police, God's justice system, and God's corrections. And we never even thought to think of ourselves as saved not but the grace of God...which means that we (me formerly) went around quoting Scriptures about working out salvation (a works doctrine) but without extending the grace that God is giving us. I don't think that those whom I call "milk" really understand what you said so well in your post. I have actually been thinking about that same idea and have been thinking about sitting and thinking more deeply about all of that but haven't yet because that kind of stuff is tiring once you realize it is so simple and that even though it is so simple most Christians won't embrace it because they actually have become as blind and deaf as the Pharisees and Sadducees..& there is no way to get them to see it. And I'm sorry that you're feeling down. I wish you God's best and hope you can get some rest. When I'm really depressed I usually am overtired and haven't eaten well enough. I know how hard it is to realize that your family does love you even though they don't communicate it well sometimes. Sometimes our extra sensitivity doesn't serve us well. Sometimes when they're not communicating with us as desired they are going through something too. So try not to take it on the chin as much..I wish I could follow that advice. You are loved!
Thank you, Rob. You're comment means a lot in so many ways.
I guess I am a little homesick.
I won't believe that Jesus cries for the state of the world today anymore than ever he has. Instead I see him secretly smiling. He has his plan and he knows its outcome is inevitable, for who shall prevail against his will? He sees each setback and each struggle and knows its meaning and its place and the eventual fruit it will bear - all in his grand scheme.
He was one with us and he knows we cannot comprehend his greater plan. He knows our faith will waver and even fail us at times. He knows the pain we cause ourselves and each other. Still I believe he smiles.
No great story is without conflict.
No great achievement is without struggle.
No great music is without dissonance.
No great love is without sorrow.
Try not to doubt. We all will, we all do, but keep trying.
Peace.
I was shocked when you mentioned that you (still!) don't have your cats with you. Then I realized that of course it must be the case, because you have not mentioned them, and you always did in your blog (and your dear older cat before that). Living alone, when you are used to living with beloved pets, is especially hard. I absolutely think that you should start looking for an apartment where you can have them. They will have less of a problem adjusting to the north than you did, I suspect!
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