As a Southerner, I believe the South has the best culinary traditions in America. I know some people will disagree; they’ll say we fry too many things. And that’s true. We do fry just about anything edible. I grew up on my grandmama’s and my mama’s cooking; both were fabulous cooks. I use the past tense because my grandmama passed away, and these days, mama doesn’t cook a whole lot. In fact, when I’m home, I usually do the cooking. But what I cook, I learned from them. Also, I used to watch the Food Network religiously when it was more informative programs and not cooking game shows like it is now.
When I moved to Vermont, what Vermonters call food was a shock. It is often bland and poorly cooked. The fact is, when Vermonters make anything “fancy,” it has at least one of four ingredients in it: maple syrup, apples, cheddar cheese, or kale. I like apples, especially hard apple cider which they make exceptionally well. I also think Vermont cheddar cheese is some of the best you can eat. However, I prefer turnips or collards to kale, and I like thick cane syrup instead of runny maple syrup.
Many restaurants have a dish called “The Vermonter,” and they are all different; each one usually has at least two of the four ingredients mentioned above—if not all four. For me, those ingredients do not necessarily go together. For example, take this Vermonter: raisin bread, sliced ham, Vermont cheddar cheese, apple slices, and apple butter. Sometimes it comes with a side of maple syrup and sometimes people will even put kale on it.
Yankee pot roast, invented in New England, is supposed to be one of their most famous dishes, but every time I’ve had it, it was tasteless and under-seasoned. Food here is just bland. If you order an open-faced sandwich which should be on toasted bread with warm sliced meat and gravy, you get plain white bread (untoasted) with cold meat and gravy. Why can’t these people cook? It’s so frustrating. Their only good dish, poutine, they stole from Quebec, and trust me, Vermonters can even mess up French fries.
They do have decent Italian restaurants, but that’s because of the large immigration of Italian sculptors who came here to carve the many deposits of granite. However, nearly all other ethnic cuisine is the worst. I can’t find a decent Chinese restaurant, and don’t get me started on what they call Mexican food. Thai food is hit or miss as is Japanese. I hear the Vietnamese restaurants are excellent, but I’ve never liked Vietnamese food. Those are about the only varieties you can get around here.
Vermont did have one attempt at a “Southern” restaurant in Montpelier once. It eventually closed. It was not terrible, but the owner put a Vermont spin on the food. She tried to make it “fancy,” and it failed. Only the small group of Southerners I know who live up here really understood it was not “Southern.” There are few barbecue places, and truthfully, they are often fairly good, even if they use maple syrup in their barbecue sauce instead of brown sugar. Prohibition Pig in Waterbury is probably my favorite restaurant in Vermont. The only problem with Pro Pig is they refuse to take reservations. It is a small restaurant and the wait can be 2-3 hours. Bluebird Barbecue in Burlington is also good, but the one time I ate there, the air conditioning wasn’t working. It was unbearable. The restaurant was featured on “Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives,” but they didn’t make barbecue for the show. They made ramen. WTF!
Anyway, that’s my diatribe on Vermont food. Every once in a while, you can find a gem amongst the rhinestones, but it’s rare. You know it's going to be bad when the state's emblem for their most famous food product looks like the bottom half of a man peeing into a bucket.
5 comments:
That's funny, I was saying "on ramen" a lot during the crackdown here. (The whole George Floyd thing, cops getting antsy, cops ignoring racists, which means "both sides do it" in Very Serious People.)
I'm originally from South Dakota, but you know how it is for bicoastal types: If (and only if) it doesn't touch the ocean, yeehaw.
There are things to be said for the Southwest, Washington, California, and Illinois.
Ingredients:
One good friend
Two Cars
Two bicycles
Instructions:
Drop one car off in Bennington, then drive to Brattleboro with friend and bikes. Park car, get on bikes (with plenty of water) and ride on Rt. 9 to Bennington. About 40 miles, lots of hills, and fantastic views It helps if you both like to bike and are fairly competitive.
As you approach Bennington, look for a roadside diner with lots of cars. Enter, and order blueberry pancakes. I would go with the maple syrup as well, not cane. And coffee. I still remember this meal and ride thirty years later.
Ride to Bennington for first car, then to Brattleboro for second.
Best done in Spring or early Fall.
Repeat as needed. Enjoy.
Well, Vermont is too small to have its own cuisine. After all, you're comparing it with southern cooking (not Mississippi cooking). What they call "Vermont cooking" sounds like something developed to sell local products to the tourists. A truer comparison would be southern cuisine versus New England cuisine. At least that way you get to include clam chowder, indian pudding, lobster, toll house cookies (now called chocolate chip), steamed salmon and peas on the 4th of July, and rhubarb pie (NOT strawberry rhubarb), as well as pot roast (which can be properly seasoned), maple syrup, and cheddar cheese. Bon appetit!
Naturally, you're still likely to prefer what you grew up with, but at least there's a better comparison. (And IMO, maple syrup has the advantage of having a real flavor.)
BTW, have I shared the definitions of Yankee with you?
To most of the world, a Yankee is an American. To an American, a Yankee is a Northerner. To a Northerner, a Yankee is a New Englander. To a New Englander, a Yankee is a Vermonter. And to a Vermonter, a Yankee is someone who eats pie for breakfast.
Naturgesetz,
I used the word "cuisine" in jest. You are right that the word cuisine pertains more to a region, like New England or the South. Vermont does not have its own cuisine, they just have bad cooks. Yes, I realize that the apples, kale, cheddar cheese, and maple syrup are probably created to sell local products to tourists, but when I have eaten "normal" food made by Vermonters, I tend to think it is subpar. I've had far better New England food in other states. Of the New England foods you mentioned, I do enjoy clam chowder, toll house cookies, and lobster, but I've never had Indian pudding, steamed salmon and peas, or rhubarb pie (I've actually never had rhubarb in any way). For southerners, the 4th of July tradition I grew up with was barbecued pork ribs. The whole 4th of July tradition may have to be another post.
You are also correct, that when placing New England Cuisine against Southern Cuisine, I would choose Southern every time. I personally think of Alabama as having the truest Southern Cuisine, but with Southern Cuisine you also have to add in the various types of BBQ, low country cooking, and cajun/creole cooking. Cajun and creole are different but from the same area of southern Louisiana. You also have gulf coast seafood dishes. I do think the South might be a bit more varied than New England.
I have to disagree with you about maple syrup. I prefer the taste of cane syrup, but I can eat maple syrup and maple flavored candies. I often just prefer not to eat it.
I love your definition of Yankee.
Thanks for contributing to the discussion,
Joe
I should also have mentioned fishcakes and beans. We used to have them with brown bread every Saturday night when I was growing up. Mom would add a couple of tablespoons of molasses to a can of baked beans. She'd add an egg to a couple of cans of fishcakes (salt cod & potato), and make small fishcakes which she'd fry. She'd heat a canned brown bread in a double boiler. Leftover brown bread would be fried for breakfast.
Some people hat hot dogs or ham with their beans, but we always had fishcakes.
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