I may be a hopeless romantic because I still love Valentine's Day. Last year, I had a wonderful man in my life, but that ended when I moved over 1300 miles away. So this year, I spent Valentine's Day alone. I'd planned on not being lonely the whole day, because I was going to brave the sub-zero temperatures and go to church. It didn't happen like I'd expected because I woke with one of my damn headache. So I stayed in and watched season 5 of Game of Thrones.
With the exception of last year, Valentine's Day has always been a dud of a day for me. The first girl I ever "dated" (if you can call just hanging out at school and claiming to be going steady) back as a young kid of maybe 12 broke up with me the day before Valentine's Day. This was particularly horrific since the school had been selling carnations to give to those you "love" and I'd bought her one. They delivered it to me to give to her and my teacher encouraged me to go give it to her, not knowing we'd "broken up." She was in the grade below me, so I had little choice as a shy kid who wasn't about to tell a teacher no, but to go knock on the door of her classroom and gove her the carnation. I was so embarrassed. I should have told my teacher that we were no longer dating and just kept the carnation to give to my mother.
I was never dating but three people when Valentine's came around. My first "girlfriend," my last girlfriend, and my boyfriend last year. Last year was a lovely day spent together. With my last girlfriend, by Valentine's I'd already decided that I no longer wanted to pretend and date girls, but she was still a good friend so we kept seeing each other for another month or so. On that Valentine's, we had a nighttime picnic overlooking a lake. It was a nice Valentine's.
This year, I tried not to think too much about it being Valentine's Day. I didn't get a single Valentine's Day card from anyone. Usually, at least my mother sends me one, but if she did, it did not arrive before Valentine's Day. I did get a couple of lovely messages from friends, and an email or two saying Happy Valentine's Day.
How was your Valentine's Day? Were you with someone you love? I hope you all were.
3 comments:
For me, better luck next year... I'm single AF.
My husband and I, in the days before we were able to legally wed, used to celebrate Valentine's Day as our anniversary. It wasn't the anniversary of anything, but it reminded us that it was in February that we had the conversation that eventually led some months later to dating and love. We had known one another for some time, but it was that conversation -- ironically, I was asking his advice about another guy I was crushing on -- that opened the door to more. Now, thanks to SCOTUS, we have an actual anniversary, but Valentine's Day retains this personal meaning for us.
BTW, I was 53 when we had that conversation and he was 56. It is never to late to find your Valentine. We have been together twelve years.
NOP!
I was alone again..
Since I broke up with my BF (36yo in Oct. 2011, I've never been with a «lover» on Valentine's Day since then...
I think that being «old» (65yo) in a gay world filled with those GODS young men adoration, I have no more hope to find THAT rare lover...
Even if I have this «KIM» 23yo fuckfriend, I feel alone and being left over...
Kim didn't even send me a email..
So, I have to get minded to be ALONE for ever...
Valentine's Day was very sad for me.... And will always be I think.
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