Walking in the Light

This is the message we have heard from him and proclaim to you, that God is light and in him there is no darkness at all. If we say that we have fellowship with him while we are walking in darkness, we lie and do not do what is true; but if we walk in the light as he himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin.

— 1 John 1:5–7

Today is a special day for me. Sixteen years ago, I clicked “Publish” on the very first post of The Closet Professor. At the time, I had no idea that one post would become thousands, or that what began as a hobby would become a chronicle of my faith, my struggles, my joys, my grief, and my journey toward authenticity.

Over those sixteen years, I have written about history, museums, literature, travel, and yes, more than a few handsome men. I’ve written about my beloved cats—Victoria, whom longtime readers knew as HRH, and now Isabella—along with my family, my work, and the places I’ve visited. More importantly, I’ve written about the tremendous grief that followed the death of a dear friend, struggles with depression, moments of doubt, unexpected blessings, and the countless ordinary days that quietly shape a life.

Looking back, I realize this blog has become more than a collection of posts. It has become a record of God’s faithfulness through seasons I never could have imagined when I wrote that first entry.

Today’s passage from 1 John reminds us that “God is light and in him there is no darkness at all.” Throughout Scripture, light symbolizes God’s presence, truth, and love. Darkness often represents fear, deception, and the things that keep us separated from God, from others, and sometimes even from ourselves.

For many LGBTQ+ Christians, that imagery carries a deeply personal meaning. Too many of us have spent years believing that who we are had to remain hidden if we wanted to be loved by God or accepted by others. We learned to compartmentalize our lives, revealing only the parts we thought were acceptable while hiding the rest. Living that way is exhausting because we are constantly afraid that someone will discover the truth.

When I chose the name The Closet Professor, it reflected where I was in life. The “closet” was still a place I understood all too well. Over the years, however, the title has taken on a different meaning for me. Rather than being a reminder of hiding, it has become a reminder of the journey God has led me on—from fear toward authenticity, from silence toward honesty, and from believing I had to hide parts of myself to trusting that I am fully known and fully loved by God.

John doesn’t tell us to become perfect before we come into the light. He simply calls us to walk in it.

Walking in the light means living honestly before God. It means trusting that God already knows us completely and loves us completely. It means allowing ourselves to be seen—not because we have everything figured out, but because we trust that God’s grace is greater than our fears.

As I continued writing The Closet Professor, I found myself becoming more honest. Some days that honesty meant celebrating life’s joys. Other days it meant admitting pain, uncertainty, loneliness, or weakness. I discovered that authenticity isn’t something to fear. It is one of the ways God draws us into deeper fellowship with Him and with one another.

John writes, “If we walk in the light as he himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another.” I have experienced that fellowship in ways I never expected. Readers from around the world have shared their own stories, encouraged me during difficult seasons, celebrated happy moments with me, challenged me to think more deeply, and reminded me that none of us walks this journey alone. What began as a simple blog has become a genuine community, and for that I am profoundly grateful.

Sixteen years later, I don’t celebrate The Closet Professor because of the number of posts I’ve written or the number of years it has existed. I celebrate because it reminds me of God’s patient work in my life. Looking back, I can see His light guiding me even when I couldn’t always see the path ahead.

Perhaps that’s what walking in the light really means. It doesn’t mean we’ve arrived. It doesn’t mean we never struggle or stumble. It means we choose, day after day, to keep following the One who is the Light of the World, trusting that every step taken in truth is a step taken closer to God.

As you reflect on today’s passage, I invite you to consider this question: What part of your life is God inviting you to bring into His light? Whatever it may be, remember that His light is not meant to shame us but to reveal the depth of His love, His grace, and His desire that we live as the people He created us to be.